I had taken a medical leave from my job teaching 4th grade in order to care for my dad. He had been diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer and needed all around care as he received treatments and neared the end of his life. I taught elementary school for 12 years in the same school district that we live in. After my dad passed on, there was his home and estate to attend to out of state, and I was devastated by his death. So I did not return to teaching that school year. During that precious time with my dad, we had many talks about the past and the future and my ideas about what I thought my life ahead would be like quickly began to change. My priorities became more clear, and the things I had focused on each and every moment of my dad while at work in the schools began to change. As many in the teaching profession can tell you, it's not been a good place to be lately. I felt the focus (kids) was being lost to data, scores, paperwork and meetings. My free time was less nourishing to my soul because I wasn't able to let go of thoughts of work and it's pressures. When I was home, my head was at school. When I was at school, my thoughts were about all that I wasn't getting done at home and all I was missing with my kids and my husband. I was feeling----lost.
So after much discussion and praying, we decided that after 12 years of teaching, I would quit my job and become a....."Stay At Home Mom". It was a great decision. But not an easy decision. And since that time, not an easy transition. It's been two years since my dad died and I am still trying to figure out this new "hat" I am wearing. The "mom walks you to the bus" hat. The "oh you don't work so you can volunteer for this right?" hat. The "I'm going to get myself organized" hat. The "wait for the kids at the school flagpole with the other moms" hat. Lots of new hats.
The best part of being home is definitely being able to give myself to my kids. It is a total blessing to have this weight off of my shoulders and I am grateful each and every day for my husband's job allowing us the financial freedom to be able to do it. I am not unaware of so many friends that wish they could do the same. But this new hat is taking some getting used to for sure.
